I have never dated or had a boyfriend and I do have some friends..actually I have 3 friends which I do talk to when I am obligated to. All my life, I find it satisfying just staying alone and being by myself.
It seems that whenever I am with other people, I feel very uncomfortable and I don't feel that I can be myself without being looked down upon.
I do everything by myself, Go shopping, movies, bars etc.....
I had a boy that I was talking (never dated, just talked on the phone) to but he got annoyed because I wasn't paying any attention to him and that I indulge in myself too much..he really hurt my feelings because he said that no one wants someone that like to stay to themselves.
I am the oldest of 3 siblings, so I don't think that is the issue. I don't think I came from a sheltered family. And whats odd is that I am Libra..Libra's are social butterflies, but I am the opposite....
I am 23 yrs old and I have never dated and refuse to hang out with my friends..I find it satisfying just......
first of all this stuff about star signs is a load of rubbish. do you really believe that the billions of people in the world can be crammed into 12 boxes!!!?? People born in the Libra timeframe range over the whole spectrum from those who are the most dangerous of psychopaths to those who are as close to saints as human beings can get. There are social butterflies born on every day of the year and there are also sensitive, private people born every day of the year.
Your lack of confidence is experienced by a very large part of humankind. Adults generally seem to grow into more of a "self core" than young people have. That means that adults are not as sensitive to social pressures as kids are...they are more solid in their self-belief.
Well the good news is that you are already showing signs of maturity (being self-sufficient enough to do things by yourself).
You are sensitive to criticism (probably are too hard on yourself in many things...set your expectations really high) but that is not a real weakness...it makes you more sensitive to the feelings of others. You may even decide to go into the helping professions and make use of this skill.
Enjoy your independence....do not compromise and go for boys who are too weak to live with your strength....ideally you will find a partner who allows you some breathing space to do things on your own and also needs some time to himself, on occasion.
There are thousands of people out there like you, who are looking for well-meaning, loyal friends...when you meet them you will find the most fulfilling of relationships....based on trust and generosity.
Reply:i'm 31 and i have the same simptoms as you
i enjoy too doing all my myself
i think many people are like you, you are unique and fell good with yourself
why should we go along with the crowd?
i am sure that at some point you will find a partner to see how wondeful you are
i am sorry for the guy who hurted you, he didn't deserve you
I am Libra too, Libras are balanced and moderate and like peace,
Reply:some people are quiet some don't shut up. some people are loners some can't stand being alone. some like pie others like cake. who you are and how you are is what makes you you. if you're happy thats what really matters.
Reply:It's normal. It's ok to prefer being to yourself I'm sure more ppl than you think do. You just aren't social (I'm not either lol).
Reply:Just be yourself,quit worrying about what others think of you!
Reply:its normal, you just got stuck in the egocentric stage of human development
Reply:its normal just take your time and try to branch out.
Reply:Possible anxiety issues? why dont you like to be social?
Reply:first you date . in dating no harm. then you decide
Reply:Well it doesnt matter if its normal. To some people you might be normal but to a lot you are not. What you should be asking of yourself is... Is this working for me? Is it getting me what I want out of life? and then perhaps ask yourself and be as honest with yourself as you can be... Why am I like this? Why do I live like this and what is my expectation when I put people off? You may find that putting people off makes the weakest come forward towards you which is a nice feeling. You may feel that to be outgoing puts you in the opposite stance, that you could get rejected and so it may be that you fear the rejection of being social. If that is the case and your current way of being is not getting you the results you desire then I would suggest giving yourself new suggestions when you feel inclined to engage in this put people off behavior. New suggestions might sound something like... It really doesnt make me cool, just wierd. It only makes the desperate come forward or stay around.. the quality people dont have to put up with it. If I am outgoing or call this person and let them get close I could get hurt but it is a risk I have to take. I do not think it is going to work well in your relationships with men as you have experienced. I do believe you are beginning to question whether this works for you as you have bothered to ask the question. Good luck. Changing is scary but I know you can make whatever changes you want to and do well.
Reply:If you are happy and contented with this lifestyle, it is totally up to you.
No-one has the right to make you feel inferior for never having dated and if you prefer to live as you are now, then good for you.....you are doing what YOU prefer and what makes YOU happy and that's what matters.
Things in our life change like the ebb and flow of the tides and the seas - so even though you feel this way now, in years to come you may feel totally different and want to settle down and that would be okay too.
Reply:Do you think that you may have Social Anxiety Disorder? Many people go throught their lives thinking that their behavior is just a "personality trait" when actually it's a disorder they've been suffering from since childhood or adolesence. If you feel this may be your case, try to get in to see a Psychiatrist. Because if this is something that you want to change, it is possible. On the other hand, if you are comfortable with yourself and your life, and you feel that your daily functioning is not imparied by this, then there is nothing wrong with that. It just depends on what you want and how you feel... Hope this helped. ^_^
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